Stop It

Dear Dairy Queen,

You've ruined a good thing. That wonderful Old Spice man made us all laugh with his declarations of what a man should be. You, on the other hand, sell ice cream. It's just not the same.

Here is a list of reasons why the Dairy Queen campaign is terrible(even though it is the same as the Old Spice campaign, which is awesome).


1. Dairy Queen ice cream isn't even that good.

2. The production quality of the Old Spice commercials is far superior. They film their commercials in single shots with all real props. No cgi bunnies and big gay flaming rainbows. Queens.

3. Old Spice did it first. There are no other Chuck Norris' out there and if anyone thinks of a joke about... let's say Burt Reynolds, that's similar to a Chuck Norris joke, it's going to have to wait. Burt Reynolds, or whoever, can wait just like Chuck Norris waited for Bill Brasky jokes to calm down. Maybe this would work in 10 years DQ, but not now.

4. The guy in the Old Spice commercials (Isaiah Mustafa) is a former NFL player and is going to be in a movie with Jennifer Aniston. He's what we call 'the man'. This white guy in the Dairy Queen ad, with his cheap porno mustache, is nothing but a knock off. It's like going from Pooh Bear to Poop Bear.

So please D Queen, cease and desist because you're awful and ruining the fun.






If you haven't seen any of the awful D Queen commercials here's a link but I don't recommend watching it because I don't want to encourage them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-VtH5xdbMtU