Thuggin

MANGUM, Okla. (AP) - A southwestern Oklahoma sheriff is dressing county inmates in hot pink jumpsuits as a deterrent to crime and to make them easier to spot.

Greer County Sheriff Devin Huckabay says the new suits replace the faded and tattered orange jumpsuits worn until now.

Huckabay says male inmates "don't like wearing them" and that the snazzy jumpsuits therefore are an incentive to not break the law and wind up in jail.

He says the prisoners wearing pink are also "hard to miss" and so can be easily managed when working on community projects or being transferred.

The prison yard is going to look like a bunch of 2002 Cam'ron's. They should have to drive to their community projects in all pink Range Rovers too.

I don't know how much the color of a jumpsuit is going to deter people from committing crimes, by the way. If the thought of getting anally raped, beaten, shanked, or just being stuck away from society hasn't already altered your behavior then I don't think this Purple Haze era jumpsuit will make a difference. Hey I got an idea! Next year we can spray paint their heads and give them silver jumpsuits. Nobody wants to look like Sisqo. Right?

About Time

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa (AP) - Traffic cameras have snapped 26 local patrol cars speeding and running red lights in eastern Iowa. Cedar Rapids Police Chief Greg Graham said six officers have been issued letters of discipline because they didn't have their patrol car's lights and sirens operating when they were speeding to a call. He said five were not violations and that the remaining 15 instances are under review.

Cedar Rapids police also have notified Marion police and the Linn County sheriff's office of possible violations by their personnel, and are investigating infractions by city buses and a garbage truck.

Marion Police Chief Harry Daugherty said the authorities must be "consistent and show no favoritism."

I see this nonsense all the time. At the very least put your lights on and pretend that your on your way somewhere important. But sometimes I see cop cars do that for the the five seconds it takes to get through an intersection and I can't say that doesn't irritate me. I hope all 15 of those "other instances" result in heavy fines. I even saw a cop today driving in New York and talking on his cell phone. Pretty sure that's been illegal here for a while. I'm tired of them roaming around breaking laws in front of our faces without any consequences. Cops are just kids who were picked on in school that couldn't wait to have some sort of authority when they grew up. I say we catch them on this stuff more often, start picking on them again. We all have cell phones with cameras on them these days. Do your civic duty and catch a cop in the act of a crime!

Major League Eater

Takeru Kobayashi, the 32-year-old Japanese dynamo, is at odds with Major League Eating, the group that officiates what's widely regarded as the Super Bowl of American gluttony. "We are trying to come to an agreement. We are at an impasse," Rich Shea, co-president of MLE, told AOL News. "We know the fans want him."

The 160-pound gustatory god stunned the world in 2001 when he doubled the world record by eating 50 hot dogs and buns in 12 minutes. Kobayashi would go on to win the coveted mustard-yellow belt at Coney Island six consecutive times. But in the past four years, Joey Chestnut of California has eaten him under the table, woofing down an amazing 68 franks and buns in just 10 minutes last year, leading some to believe the former hot dog champ has turned chicken.

MLE won't say what the sticking points are as it negotiates with Kobayashi's lawyers. But Shea indicated that it's no different than what goes on in other sports. "Certainly, you wouldn't see Tom Brady compete in arena football a week after the Super Bowl," he said.

Competitive eating is not a sport. There, I said it. It's nothing but gluttony. But it sure is fun to watch. I know I couldn't eat more than four or five hot dogs and how this man can eat 50 of them in 12 minutes I can't even comprehend. But it isn't the actual eating I enjoy watching, it's the thought of what they will feel like later and what they're next trip to the bathroom will be like that I really enjoy. Still though, Kobayashi is no Joey Chestnut. You can't out eat an American! Eating is our thing and you can't take that away from us.

By the way, good one Shea, comparing Kobayashi to Tom Brady. Classic. I don't think anyone believes that the MLE is synonymous with the NFL. Nice try though.

Wait, What?

Police said a 30-year-old woman apparently fell out of a third-story window, landed on her parked car, and then walked into a neighbor's house, where she fell asleep on a couch for two hours. Lakemoor Police Chief Mike Marchese said family members believe the woman woke up before dawn Thursday and fell through the screen while opening a third-floor window.

Marchese said the woman bounced off the hood of her car, walked through a neighbor's open garage door and went into the house.

The neighbor found her asleep two hours later and called 911.

The woman, whom police have not identified, was taken by ambulance to Centegra Hospital-McHenry. Marchese said she was not suffering from any life-threatening injuries, but he did not know her condition.

Is it just me or does there seem to be some information missing here? A lot of the time when I reference articles I only quote a paragraph or two but this is the entire article and it seems to be taken a little lightly in my opinion. This is totally insane. People don't fall out of buildings very often.

How the hell did she survive that fall? Does her car have a trampoline hood? Did she bounce to a standing position? Was she tired before she fell? Does falling three stories bring about intense sleepiness?

The only possible explanation is that she's a super hero tired from a long night of crime fighting.

Dirty Money

Last week, we reported that Steve Wilson, of the St. Louis company DoodyCalls Pet Waste Removal, found $58 worth of chewed currency in a pile of doggy doo. And it turns out that these now-famous bills might be worth far more than $58 to the Humane Society of the United States. Dog owner Karen Linn is auctioning the actual bills, eaten by her dog Fozzie, on eBay. She wants to use the money that was consumed by her own rescued shelter dog to help shelter dogs across the nation.

But that's not her only motivation. "I want to draw attention to the fact that if you're not careful, your dog can chew up and swallow just about anything," Linn said. Money isn't the only thing Fozzie, her golden-doodle -- a golden retriever and poodle mix -- has eaten. "He once ate one of my bras," she told AOL News, adding that the 110-pound pooch passed the entire garment in one piece.

Unbelievable. The nerve of some people. She's auctioning off money that her dog ate to raise awareness to the fact that dogs sometimes eat things that aren't food. I think the only person that needs to be more aware of the situation is you, Karen. Maybe instead of this stupid waste of time auction you could just not leave your bras laying around everywhere and maybe put your money in your wallet. Another idea is to actually train your dog to not eat things in your house that aren't dog food. It sounds to me like you have a dumb ass dog that you're probably starving to death. So call off the auction because no one wants your crap covered cash.